MEMO: Life Changes

Memo

To:  Friends, Family, Blog-o-Sphere
From:  Blue and Bettina’s Mumma
Date:  April 1, 2013
Subject:  Major Decision

I wanted to share with all of my friends, family and blog-o-sphere friends the life altering decision I have been agonizing over for the last month.  It was not an easy decision to reach but I gave it a lot of soul searching and I feel pretty good that the new direction I will be going in is the right decision for me.

It is no secret that I am a fanatic regarding all things greyhound.  And particularly my own babies.  Greyhounds are among the things that make me most happy in life.  Since I can think of nothing better than to be a retired racing greyhound, I have decided to make that dream come true.  I will be giving notice at my job and taking some time away to make this a reality. 

I have found a plastic surgeon in Kuala Lumpur who specializes in human to canine plastic surgery.  He has assured me that by the time he is done, I will be a very tall greyhound.  I’m probably going to have to pay a little extra for the necessary liposuction or I’ll also look like a very fat greyhound.  I believe that skipping the initial life phases of a greyhound is best in my particular case.  I’ve never been a very fast runner and I stuck to the field events while on the track team in high school.  So I will go directly to the retirement portion of a greyhound’s life.

I have decided the best way to pay for the numerous procedures I’ll need is to mortgage the house.  Then I’ll rent it out and build a lovely kennel on part of the land.  Whoever rents the house will have charge of feeding, watering and poop-scooping for Blue, Bettina and I. 

I am very excited to step into this new chapter in my life.  I’m looking forward to a life of ease with comfy beds, treats and snuggles.  We ask that all our friends send your best thoughts for a successful and ultimately rewarding transition.  Since I will no longer be able to type once I have paws, this will be my final blog entry.